“Bless Ur Heart,” came about when I moved back to my hometown Knoxville, Tennessee this past summer. After a stint of inspiration and motivation being much harder to come by than usual, being surrounded by the landscape, weather, and people that I love so dearly sparked new ideas almost instantly. I became particularly interested in the way southerners often talk. Certain phrases and ways of speaking can hold mixed messages that are often found in places with that beloved “southern charm.” For example, I’ve noticed the words “bless your heart” being used and perceived as a condescending and judgmental response to one’s problems or shortcomings. This phrase is particularly relevant to me because my mom says it quite often, but only when she genuinely feels bad for someone. I remember countless times as a kid when she said this while comforting me after I got hurt. In fact, she said it just the other day during a conversation about a friend’s father who recently passed away. This energy is quite different than hearing “bless her heart” when gossiping about a young woman who ended up in psychiatric care, or “bless his heart” when hearing rumors about a boy everyone thought was bright ending up in rehab.
As I consider this contrast in several southern sayings, the more I notice in an other aspects of the culture. The exit I take on I-40 when heading to my beloved (and staunchly progressive) boyfriend’s house is marked by a massive, illuminated sign for a “TRUMP SUPERSTORE.” When traveling east to visit Dollywood, a theme park co-owned by Dolly Parton, a legendary talent and humanitarian, I see more anti-abortion billboards and confederate flags than I care to count. When I first moved to Savannah, Georgia for college, I remember friends that had come from areas outside of the southeast United States being confused by friendliness extended to them from strangers. After I graduated and continued living there, I remember becoming exhausted by the amount of small town gossip and judgment constantly present within local communities. This noticed juxtaposition, and my ever growing curiosity and attraction to the power of love and kindness, is guiding me to consider the aspects of so-called “southern charm” and the “American dream” that are genuine, moving, and meaningful, as well as those that may be back-handed, false, and even harmful.
Additionally, living in Knoxville again for the first time since graduating high school has also meant spending more time with my family. Growing up in Jackson, Tennessee, my mom always has the best stories. Her grandmother, Mamacille, was a talented quilter and seamstress. I have several quilts she made and am in awe of the craftsmanship and attention to detail. I never got to meet her, but as one of my mom’s favorite people, I love that her and I share a hand for craft. For or as long as I’ve worked with textiles I’ve used recycled and dead-stock material as much as possible. Mamacille made her quilts out of recycled material like her old pantsuits and scrap fabrics. Reuse of textiles and waste materials has been done out of necessity for generations, a small step that can be taken towards acting as stewards of our environment.
Materially, this series is being made out of old work that’s run its course, scraps and samples I’ve saved from various projects, yarn I’ve had for years and haven’t found a use for, canvas frames with damaged paintings, and whatever else I can utilize without contributing to “fast” consumption. By using recycled materials, I engage with the importance of reimagining waste into something meaningful, contributing to the conversation of environmental responsibility and collective action. Several pieces from the series look to organisms like worms and maggots, which are often seen as repulsive, but are simultaneously crucial for the environment as decomposers and recyclers of the earth’s soil. I create shapes with machine knit tubes, stuffed with donated and found materials such as old clothes, yarn scraps, plastic grocery bags, deconstructed pillows, worn out stuffed animals, ex-boyfriend’s old socks, etc.
“Bless Ur Heart” is currently centered around the aspects of so-called “southern charm” that are genuine, moving, and meaningful, as well as those that may be back-handed, false, and even harmful. While the process of working towards true mental health fosters growth and major positive change in one’s life, the stigma surrounding mental illness can make these conversations uncomfortable and unwelcome. I would like to delve further into the why the sharing of mental health struggles is often met with judgment, and I would like to offer a space where viewers can come together to reflect on shared human experiences to engage in conversations that promote healing and growth.
